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I was diagnosed with cancer not once, but twice.
About ten years ago, my husband was pushing me to get a check-up. There was no history of breast cancer in my family. I felt fine. "Just do it for me," he said. The mammogram showed a tiny lump, too small to feel. It was cancer.
What would have happened if my husband hadn’t persuaded me? Mammograms save lives.
You can fight this. Keep a positive attitude.
After a lumpectomy and radiation, I was in the clear.
But four years and eleven months later, I started having pain in my arm. My surgeon said he would have to go in and look. When I woke up, my husband was crying. The surgeon said he was sorry. It was cancer again.
This was a much tougher blow than the first time. I had already beaten cancer once, I shouldn’t have to fight it again. I was scared. I was angry.
My oncologist told me to concentrate on getting myself well and focus on the thought that I am going to be well again: "We’re going to get through this," he said, "If you keep a positive attitude, you can do it." I held on to that.
One thing that helped was to simply continue normal, everyday life while I was being treated. I wanted my children to enjoy their lives and not worry about me. Friends helped when they just treated me normally. They were always there with love and support, but they treated me the way they always had, not like a "Cancer Patient." I went to my children’s plays, I went to the gym, and those everyday things took my mind off my treatment.
I went through different phases. When you get the diagnosis, you’re in sort of black hole. "Why is this happening? What am I going to do?" Then you get a plan and start the phase of fighting it. Later there’s a post-cancer, post-treatment phase: redefining who you are and how you can change your life for the better and stay on a positive road. Now I’ve been cancer-free for over six years, and I don’t even think about it every day.
A lot of people know about my experience, so I get calls from women who’ve been diagnosed with breast cancer. The first thing I tell them is "You can fight this. Keep a positive attitude."
I tell them, too, not to be afraid to lean on other people. It’s okay to feel vulnerable and accept support and love from people. Surround yourself with people you love and tell them your fears and desires and how you want to be during that time. Let people in.
And I always tell them to ask questions, learn what’s out there, make yourself aware of all your options. When you know you’re doing everything you can to fight it, it helps you keep that positive attitude.
I think it really helps to talk to somebody who’s been through it. When you talk to someone who’s been cancer free for years, you say, "That can be me."
- Winnie
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